He did it again!

The doorbell rang.

No one there.

I waited about an hour, then looked.

And low and behold, on my doormat a huge begonia (beyond it's prime, really)

With a note

For my dearest friend and neighbor.
This will look so pretty on your balcony.
Love, Adam

ARGHHHHHHH

I wrote on the note:

Please stop!
I prefer to be left alone!
Thanks.

And put the plant back  in front of his door.

It is starting to feel like harassment to me.

I'm afraid to leave my house.

I just don't feel very social these days. Just don't want any buddies, pretend I'm a happy girl, because I am not.

I am still smarting. It feels like I'm a different person.
I think my family doesn't understand. Well, my daughter does, she is having a bear of a time with it herself.
But it is just so difficult to convince people that I am numb and sad and angry and lonely.
That it takes all my energy to get up in the morning and get going.
It's a good day when I get the laundry done, when I wash the floors, vacuum. Even dusted the other day.
eBay listings keeps me busy for a few hours, but I am running out of things to sell.

At least I am planning to go swimming tomorrow.
Packed my bag and I am going to be a good girl and GO.

Spider called me the other day, was on her way to the ER. Was having horrid tummy pains that felt like something she never felt before.
They did an ultra sound. No tumors, no visible reasons except for a few "constricted" blood vessels that were filled to the max, and probably were the cause.
They referred her to a gynecologist.
Of course she hasn't made the appointment yet.
I've been telling her since she had Boo that she needed to GO, since with the last pap they found some questionable cells.

On Wednesday she is having her interview at Target.

Keeping my fingers crossed.

SGMKJ